Self Help Books
Hi, I'm Ashley, and I love Self-Help Books
Hi, Ashley!
But seriously, I do. I probably have a self help book for every aspect of life. I have talked to a LOT of girlfriends and trust me when I say, I am by no means the only one. There is a strange high you get from them. It's like for this brief second you're so empowered and willing to take on that work crisis, or you're going to read the bible cover to cover like the book encouraged you to do! Then about a week passes and you're back to your old self- craving another book to get that high.
Yes, I just compared Self-Help books with getting high (thank God they don't drug test for that at work....phew!).
Aside from my strange love of Self-Help books, I also love regular books too. I spend a LOT of money on Amazon. My kindle is constantly on low battery because I take it everywhere I go.
So today, as I was perusing on Amazon, I noticed the "recommended for you" section. I always glance through that section because you never know. Much to my dismay, today it was occupied solely by Self-Help books. Clearly I have a problem, because I scrolled through the options anyway.
They were all obnoxious. Some of the titles included:
-The Little Black Book of Big Red Flags
-Make Him Commit and Think It was His Idea
-He's Just Not That Into You (silly, Amazon, that's already on my bookshelf)
-How to Make Any Man Fall in Love with You
-Why You're Still Single (damn, Amazon, you are brutal today!)
So after I poured a GIANT glass of wine and relished in my apparent pathetic life that Amazon.com seems to think I have, I got to thinking about that empowerment I usually get from the self-help books.
Seriously, do I honestly need a book to tell me a guy is "just not that into" me? No. I'm not stupid. It's pretty obvious when you're getting phased out by a guy- or by the fact that he's telling you over and over that he doesn't want a girlfriend....it means he doesn't want YOU as a girlfriend. Are women seriously SO dumb that we can't see these things? Moreover, are we SO insecure we need a book to tell us how to make a man fall in love with us or tell us why we are still single?
Amazon, I know why I am still single- because I had a LOT of crap to work through and frankly no one wanted to deal with it- especially me. I also know how to make someone fall in love with me, because I've been in love a few times. And the Red Flags? Of course all women know them....we just choose to ignore them. We aren't blind, just foolish.
I don't know what it was about today that made me hate my Self-Help books. Probably because I've spent hundreds of dollars on books that tell me exactly the same stuff my friends tell me, or that I tell myself. Guess what? The way to make someone fall in love with you? Be exactly who you are and love every piece of it and people will love you for it. How to make him commit? Easy, stop settling for jerks who won't commit (I'll go ahead and say I've used the 'I don't want a commitment' line plenty of times myself....but at the end of the day it really translates into 'I don't want to commit to YOU').
We search for answers to our questions, simply because we don't want to accept what's right in front of us. We KNOW these answers. We KNOW the outcome. We just hope that it's different. Sorry to tell you ladies, it doesn't matter how high your heels are, how red your lips are, or how deep your knowledge in 90's grunge rock is-- things aren't going to work out unless there is chemistry and willingness on both sides. It's as simple and as frustrating as that.
So my advice? Stick to the 50 Shades of Grey series....trust me you'll get way more out of it
(this new-found hate for self-help books does not include my books on finances....because damn budgeting is HARD!)
Hi, Ashley!
But seriously, I do. I probably have a self help book for every aspect of life. I have talked to a LOT of girlfriends and trust me when I say, I am by no means the only one. There is a strange high you get from them. It's like for this brief second you're so empowered and willing to take on that work crisis, or you're going to read the bible cover to cover like the book encouraged you to do! Then about a week passes and you're back to your old self- craving another book to get that high.
Yes, I just compared Self-Help books with getting high (thank God they don't drug test for that at work....phew!).
Aside from my strange love of Self-Help books, I also love regular books too. I spend a LOT of money on Amazon. My kindle is constantly on low battery because I take it everywhere I go.
So today, as I was perusing on Amazon, I noticed the "recommended for you" section. I always glance through that section because you never know. Much to my dismay, today it was occupied solely by Self-Help books. Clearly I have a problem, because I scrolled through the options anyway.
They were all obnoxious. Some of the titles included:
-The Little Black Book of Big Red Flags
-Make Him Commit and Think It was His Idea
-He's Just Not That Into You (silly, Amazon, that's already on my bookshelf)
-How to Make Any Man Fall in Love with You
-Why You're Still Single (damn, Amazon, you are brutal today!)
So after I poured a GIANT glass of wine and relished in my apparent pathetic life that Amazon.com seems to think I have, I got to thinking about that empowerment I usually get from the self-help books.
Seriously, do I honestly need a book to tell me a guy is "just not that into" me? No. I'm not stupid. It's pretty obvious when you're getting phased out by a guy- or by the fact that he's telling you over and over that he doesn't want a girlfriend....it means he doesn't want YOU as a girlfriend. Are women seriously SO dumb that we can't see these things? Moreover, are we SO insecure we need a book to tell us how to make a man fall in love with us or tell us why we are still single?
Amazon, I know why I am still single- because I had a LOT of crap to work through and frankly no one wanted to deal with it- especially me. I also know how to make someone fall in love with me, because I've been in love a few times. And the Red Flags? Of course all women know them....we just choose to ignore them. We aren't blind, just foolish.
I don't know what it was about today that made me hate my Self-Help books. Probably because I've spent hundreds of dollars on books that tell me exactly the same stuff my friends tell me, or that I tell myself. Guess what? The way to make someone fall in love with you? Be exactly who you are and love every piece of it and people will love you for it. How to make him commit? Easy, stop settling for jerks who won't commit (I'll go ahead and say I've used the 'I don't want a commitment' line plenty of times myself....but at the end of the day it really translates into 'I don't want to commit to YOU').
We search for answers to our questions, simply because we don't want to accept what's right in front of us. We KNOW these answers. We KNOW the outcome. We just hope that it's different. Sorry to tell you ladies, it doesn't matter how high your heels are, how red your lips are, or how deep your knowledge in 90's grunge rock is-- things aren't going to work out unless there is chemistry and willingness on both sides. It's as simple and as frustrating as that.
So my advice? Stick to the 50 Shades of Grey series....trust me you'll get way more out of it
(this new-found hate for self-help books does not include my books on finances....because damn budgeting is HARD!)
I'm glad you know why you are still single. Because I always ask myself,"why isn't this beautiful human being not married!"
ReplyDeleteI had self help book phase as well, they all had to do with free thinking, or being "your own boss." I felt like all the advice I was reading, was cliché's I had learned when I was young. Work hard. Set goals. Focus and never loose sight.
I enjoy your blog Ashley, and you're awesome!
Thanks, Joe! Also, thanks for admitting your overcoming your self-help problem. You're an inspiration to those of us still suffering :)
ReplyDelete