"I'm Not That Innocent" - Take 2
As most of the population is aware, there was a performance by Miley Cyrus on Sunday night. Personally, I didn't care about that, since NSYNC was reuniting and, well, frankly, no matter what anyone else did in that building that night, it didn't compare to those glorious 5 men reuniting and bringing all my pre-teen emotions back to me.....
....sorry got lost in some "This I Promise You" memories. I'm back.
Anyway, I'm an avid reader (ok, CNN.com and Perez Hilton....but it still counts!). I have social media so I've seen the outrage. I even watched the performance. Definitely seemed like a bad trip to me, but then again I've never tripped before so I really have no basis for that.
People are outraged by Miley because she was provocative, sexual, and "out of control." People are mad because she's a bad example to young girls. People think her performance was borderline pornographic (I can't say I disagree there, is she pregnant with Robin Thicke's baby now?!).
I think it's funny. It's just like Britney Spears before her. And Christina. And Madonna. And Katy Perry (she kissed a girl, and she liked it, after all). Why are people shocked anymore? What makes you think this won't happen again, and again, and again, and again?
I can remember pictures of myself back when I was 18, 19, 20. Most have since been deleted from facebook (thank God!), but they were not appropriate at all. No, I wasn't wearing a teddy bear corset (not that anyone ever should, not cute), but there are a lot of pictures of me bent over in front of girlfriends and even some of my guy friends. Pictures of me giving kisses to my girlfriends because it got us free drinks and we thought it was hysterical. Pictures of me with very low cut shirts because that was what I had so I felt the need to flaunt it.
Have you seen girls' Halloween costumes? Every day is Halloween for stars, every day is another opportunity to dress up and be someone, because we're all watching.
We hold these stars up to a higher standard because they "influence" people? Please. We influence each other. Not to mention, why are you letting your young kid watch MTV? Should the blame be on the parents here? What about MTV is appropriate for a young audience? Is it the drunk messes on Jersey Shore? Or is it the role models on 16 and Pregnant or Teen Mom?
You can raise your daughters to see these performances and still be standup girls. You can still have standards for how your own daughter will dress and behave. Chances are good the parents are the ones purchasing the clothing for their kids so make sure they come out of the dressing room with every outfit on so you can approve? That's what my mom did. If you notice behavior you don't approve of, talk to your kid. It's really not that hard. I can pretty much guarantee there aren't going to be other 7th graders walking around in teddy bear corsets this year at school, so I think you'll be fine to say no to that wardrobe choice.
When your daughters are 18-20, chances are good they, too, will explore the world of adulthood - just like Miley is trying to do. Let them. They only get a few years as young adults to have some fun and be crazy with their friends. One day they will wake up, have to take out their 10 ear piercings and nose ring, spend money on well fitting dress pants instead of a crop top, and be a *real* adult.
For those of us that aren't celebrities, reality comes quick and those pictures of you bent over in front of your friends in college becomes embarrassing (and prevent you from getting your dream job). Most of us go through phases. The key here is to help your daughters find the right influences, and to be supportive and open parents so that when the time comes that they want to explore "twerking" and scandalous actions, they'll talk to you. If nothing else, show them those old pictures of you and they'll be so mortified they'll never want to do those things.
Then, you can play them the music of your time too- a little "BYE BYE BYE" never hurt anyone!
....sorry got lost in some "This I Promise You" memories. I'm back.
Anyway, I'm an avid reader (ok, CNN.com and Perez Hilton....but it still counts!). I have social media so I've seen the outrage. I even watched the performance. Definitely seemed like a bad trip to me, but then again I've never tripped before so I really have no basis for that.
People are outraged by Miley because she was provocative, sexual, and "out of control." People are mad because she's a bad example to young girls. People think her performance was borderline pornographic (I can't say I disagree there, is she pregnant with Robin Thicke's baby now?!).
I think it's funny. It's just like Britney Spears before her. And Christina. And Madonna. And Katy Perry (she kissed a girl, and she liked it, after all). Why are people shocked anymore? What makes you think this won't happen again, and again, and again, and again?
I can remember pictures of myself back when I was 18, 19, 20. Most have since been deleted from facebook (thank God!), but they were not appropriate at all. No, I wasn't wearing a teddy bear corset (not that anyone ever should, not cute), but there are a lot of pictures of me bent over in front of girlfriends and even some of my guy friends. Pictures of me giving kisses to my girlfriends because it got us free drinks and we thought it was hysterical. Pictures of me with very low cut shirts because that was what I had so I felt the need to flaunt it.
Have you seen girls' Halloween costumes? Every day is Halloween for stars, every day is another opportunity to dress up and be someone, because we're all watching.
We hold these stars up to a higher standard because they "influence" people? Please. We influence each other. Not to mention, why are you letting your young kid watch MTV? Should the blame be on the parents here? What about MTV is appropriate for a young audience? Is it the drunk messes on Jersey Shore? Or is it the role models on 16 and Pregnant or Teen Mom?
You can raise your daughters to see these performances and still be standup girls. You can still have standards for how your own daughter will dress and behave. Chances are good the parents are the ones purchasing the clothing for their kids so make sure they come out of the dressing room with every outfit on so you can approve? That's what my mom did. If you notice behavior you don't approve of, talk to your kid. It's really not that hard. I can pretty much guarantee there aren't going to be other 7th graders walking around in teddy bear corsets this year at school, so I think you'll be fine to say no to that wardrobe choice.
When your daughters are 18-20, chances are good they, too, will explore the world of adulthood - just like Miley is trying to do. Let them. They only get a few years as young adults to have some fun and be crazy with their friends. One day they will wake up, have to take out their 10 ear piercings and nose ring, spend money on well fitting dress pants instead of a crop top, and be a *real* adult.
For those of us that aren't celebrities, reality comes quick and those pictures of you bent over in front of your friends in college becomes embarrassing (and prevent you from getting your dream job). Most of us go through phases. The key here is to help your daughters find the right influences, and to be supportive and open parents so that when the time comes that they want to explore "twerking" and scandalous actions, they'll talk to you. If nothing else, show them those old pictures of you and they'll be so mortified they'll never want to do those things.
Then, you can play them the music of your time too- a little "BYE BYE BYE" never hurt anyone!
BSB for life!
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